My favorite part of the NFL Network’s Sunday morning pregame gab-fest is the bold predictions segment, a lighthearted five-minute bit during which the on-camera talent Kurt Warner, Steve Mariucci, Gerald McCoy, and Rich Eisen drop their wacky prognostications for the upcoming games.
Their predictions, while next-level absurd, are eminently enjoyable.
And they literally never get a single one of them right.
Mind you, this isn’t a diss. It’s more like commiseration.
Because I never get them right either.
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Listen, I’ve dropped dozens upon dozens of Chicago Bears bold predictions — or, as I fondly call them, boldies — on my Substack page for years now, and I haven’t nailed a single one.
I’ve come close, mind you, but haven’t gotten over the boldie hump. But neither have Kurt, Mooch, Gerald, or Rich, so I’m in good company.
My failures, however, won’t stop me from trying.
And while we’re on the subject of trying, you should never stop trying PrizePicks, where you can win real money with your NFL predictions…sometimes even the bold ones.
Don’t be stuck with the same Lineup every week — just pick More or Less on at least two player projections and win real cash with your picks for each NFL slate.
Now let’s get bold, y’all.
NFL Fantasy Football Bold Predictions, Week 3
1) The Dallas Cowboys Might Just Do Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Things to the Chicago Bears
Last Sunday, the Chicago Bears allowed 52 points, 511 passing yards, and 177 rushing yards to the Detroit Lions.
Last Sunday, the Dallas Cowboys racked up 40 points, 343 passing yards, and 135 rushing yards against the New York Giants.
If we create a verrrrrry basic metric — adding up the numbers for each stat, then dividing it by two — we can posit that the ‘Boys will score 46, pass for 427 yards, and rush for 156.
Those are some cray-cray numbers, but when Dallas rolls into Soldier Field, they could potentially not just hit ‘em, but exceed ‘em. This all should put Cowboys QB Dak Prescott, RB Javonte Williams, and WRs CeeDee Lamb and George Pickens squarely in your fantasy sights.
2) The Week 3 Buffalo Bills’ Offense Could Be Scarier Than the Week 1 Buffalo Bills’ Offense
In Buffalo's Opening Night clash with the Baltimore Ravens, Bills QB Josh Allen blew up FantasyLand, racking up an absurd 38.8 fantasy points (the week's fantasy QB1, natch), with James Cook contributing 18.2 of his own (RB4).
None of Buffalo’s pass-catchers made any significant noise, because Allen is the kind of ball-sharing signal caller who drives fantasy managers out of their gourds — eight receivers saw passes, four of whom were targeted 5-plus times — but who cares, because Allen and Cook have cooked, with the signal caller currently this season’s QB3, and the rusher standing at RB1.
Miami’s defense, in a word, stinks, landing 26th in yards allowed per game (375.5) and 31st in points allowed (33.0).
So on Thursday night, Buffalo could channel their inner Week 1, deliver their best offensive numbers of the year — especially Allen and Cook — and roll their divisional rivals.
3) The Cincinnati/Minnesota Game Could Be Even Snoozier Than You Expect
Bengals starting QB Joe Burrow (toe) and his Minnesota counterpart J.J. McCarthy (ankle) are both on the shelf, and their replacements are less than inspiring.
Cincy will trot out Jake Browning who, last Sunday, in the span of three quarters, was picked 3 times and sacked once by the Jacksonville defense.
Now the Jaguars’ defense is somewhat better than Minnesota’s — the Vikes allow 23.0 points per game, as compared to the Jags’ 20.5 — but the Vikings have had a week to watch Browning’s tape, and their tricky D-coordinator Brian Flores might find a way to make the backup signal caller’s life miserable.
The Vikes counter with QB Carson Wentz, who hasn’t thrown 30-plus passes in a game since October 9, 2022, meaning he’ll be rustier than a 1979 Volkswagen Beetle.
The teams might combine for fewer yards than you’ll think — like way fewer yards — so it could be a good week to (gasp) consider trading Minny WR Justin Jefferson and getting a haul that’ll get you across your fantasy finish line.
4) Say Hello to the Chiefs’ Breakout Night?
As noted, the Cowboys brutalized the Giants in Week 2 — we’ll torture New Yorkers with a repeat of Dallas’ major stats: 40 points, 343 passing yards, 135 rushing yards — so a trip to Kansas City to face a likely cheesed-off Chiefs team that’s playing some of its worst ball of the HC Andy Reid era ain’t exactly what the doctor (or Jints HC Brian Daboll) ordered.
Based on K.C.’s 0-2 record, some might be surprised that Patrick Mahomes is this season’s fantasy QB4, but that can be attributed to his groundwork: 123 rushing yards and 2 rushing touchdowns.
Thing is, Pat's getting exactly no help. His top two running backs, Isiah Pacheco and Kareem Hunt, have combined — combined — for 11.7 fantasy points, and his WR battalion has combined — combined — for 35.0 fantasy points.
For context, 36 single RBs have more fantasy points than the Chiefs’ backfield, while Giants WR Malik Nabers and Lions WR Amon-Ra St. Brown topped K.C.’s 35.0 WR fantasy points all by their lonesomes.
Welp, enough is enough.
On the Sunday night game in New York, we might just see Mahomes go Full Mahomes, Pacheco go Full Pacheco, and the wide receivers go Full Wide Receivers in a game that could get the Chiefs off the schneid and turn their season around.
Will our predictions out-bold Mooch, Kurt, Rich, and Gerald's? Who the heck knows, but one thing we do know is you can win real money on PrizePicks with your NFL predictions.
Just pick More or Less on at least two player projections and potentially win real cash with your picks every week.
And follow Playbook for the entire NFL season, where you'll always enjoy boldness galore.
